Notes From the Peanut Gallery

A few quick thoughts to quiet the hecklers from the peanut gallery. AND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
Ahem.
Apparently, there is not a lot of love out there for the monkeys. Now, I myself did say that they weren't necessarily my favorite members of the Perp Wall, but it's not like they're disfigured or wandering around with axes in their hands and murder on their minds. Still, the words "creepy", "weird" and "sandy-faced" (okay, I'll give you that one) have come up in the last few days along with requests for new posts to take them off of headliner status. Never mind that I have been dealing with HOSPITALS and DOCTORS and POTENTIALLY MORTALLY ILL MOTHERS for two months. Priorities people. That's all I'm saying

Ergo:

• Driving to work this morning with what might be the stupidest traffic I have been in for a while (and that's saying something when you factor in the pure amount of driving I do these days), I noticed an 18-wheeler, flatbed truck next to me in the center lane. On the back of the rig, at the top edge of its cab, was the question "Whos (sic) Your Daddy?" To which I immediately replied (as I sped by, natch) "Not you baby!" There may even have been a jaunty wave.
• Two weeks ago I was sitting in my car in the parking lot of my lunchtime appointment, talking to my aunt on the phone and giving her the most recent update on my mom's health. While we were speaking, I began to gather what I needed for the appointment and was ticking things off in my mind as I went along until I was left with only my cell phone to locate. At which point I had a mind panic attack when I couldn't immediately locate it before I realized that I was already on it!
• Yesterday, a college roommate rang me just as I was finishing up work and we spent some time chatting and catching up. I had been putting off going to the ladies room until the job I was waiting for was completed so that I could hit the bathroom on my way to the car and not have to go out from my desk twice. Yep, I'm just that lazy. And then Robin called. Needless to say, through the course of our conversation, my bladder grew increasingly - exponentially - uncomfortable. So I start booting down my computer, packing my bag, putting my glasses away, etc. all the trappings of getting ready to leave. I figured I didn't have to get off the phone, but rather that I could keep talking to Robin as I went along down the hallway and out to the lobby to the loo. I knew from experience that Robin wouldn't take offense at that and was pleased with my efficient solution. Up to the point when I realized that I was speaking to her on my office phone, not my cell phone. Don't think the phone cord reaches quite that far. The sad thing? Putting my cell phone in my purse was not the means by which I'd figured that out.
• GM announced today that they are closing 4 plants that make SUVs and Hummers, affecting approx. 10,000 workers as "surging gas prices hasten a dramatic shift to smaller vehicles" according to MSNBC. Furthermore, MSNBC reports that GM is considering dropping the entire line of Hummers amidst slumping sales. This means that I might actually be able to see around the vehicle in front of me for a change. But it's a sad and scary indication how this petrol issue is trickling through our economy to all areas, not only consumables. Makes me appreciate my four cylinder even more - though I wouldn't mind a little faster pick up on the hills.
• Also per MSNBC - and every other news agent on the known planet - "Obama Clinches Democratic Nomination." Oh crap. Now I have to vote republican. I hate voting republican. I was soooo looking forward to getting those jackasses out of office this election.
• Finally, I laughed out loud at this at least 4 times. But then, that's me.